tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-48532906964106385422024-03-19T03:32:21.249-07:00The Short BusUnknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-51546309702292540802011-03-12T03:05:00.001-08:002011-03-12T04:55:22.952-08:00Dumbasses<div style="text-align: justify;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">Using StumbeUpon, I came across this </span><a style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);" href="http://apina.biz/39128.jpg"><span style="color: rgb(51, 51, 255); font-weight: bold;">image</span><span style="font-weight: bold;"> </span></a><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">that showcases some of the dregs of our species. So...I got up on Facebook and searched for them. Some of them I found. Others I didn't. Some had their comments still there. Others didn't.</span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);">What a truly fucked up group of human beings. Here's a list of their names in alphabetical order, followed by screen shots of their profiles (the ones I found) as found on FB on 3/12/11. Click on each FB screenshot to embiggen said creatures' profile screenshots:</span><br /></div><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);font-size:85%;" >BACH, AIDAN<br />BALDRIDGE, VIC<br />BARD, JIM<br />BARRIER, COLE<br />BLAINE, LARRY<br />BRIMER, JONATHAN<br />BROSEY, OSCAR<br />CANSDALE, JOE<br />COOK, DELVIN<br />CORLISS, TOMMY<br />CROWELL, JASON<br />DANIEL, TAYLOR<br />DELA CRUZ, MARTYN<br />DELEO, MANNY<br />DIAL, DEAN<br />DOTSON, ERIC<br />DUNLEVY, PATRICK JAMES<br />FISHER, OTIS<br />GODFREY, WALLY<br />GUMBS III, RAY<br />HIGGINS, JOHN<br />HOWARD, CONNOR<br />IKERD, GREG<br />KOPP, JERRY<br />KREMENLIFF, TREVOR<br />KRIEBEL, JACOB<br />LAMBERT, JOHN<br />LAWSON, DEBORAH<br />LEE, DIANE<br />LOPEZ, ROBERT<br />MADRID, RICHARD<br />MANN, MARTY<br />MARIE, ASHLEY<br />MILLER, MICHAEL<br />MODLE, MIKE<br />MORRIS, DESHAUN<br />MORRISSEY, DOUG<br />MUNIZ, MARIO<br />NELSON, BOBBY<br />NICHOLSON, LUKE<br />NIEMI, NIKO<br />OTERO, MARC<br />PEDERSON, MIKEY<br />PITARD, ROBERT<br />RAMIREZ, ANDRE<br />RECCO, MATT<br />ROWELL,JAMES<br />SELLITTO, MIKE<br />SIMMERING, JACK<br />TRASK, CHRIS<br />VELMONT, SEBASTIAN<br />WHITFIELD, ARRON<br />WITT-AGNEW, LOGAN<br />WULF, GEORGE</span><br /><br /><a style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjg_F9GNihAryD65HtQC1X0UNfZVYbjdGIWSbPFEIdZwk7hJpReasfU0P5OBPWCOaXxIsd9MfkIh1EeJQ7W81uMMpZUGVJPWU6cSdXoVaoYEEWBNmzDMd3kwLaXhHCWEJLGFtBQgjuWyPJo/s1600/dumbass28.JPG"><img style="float: left; 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margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 158px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrnIxB9umizsj27QSz5gZ4klKmBQmBRzFun6fMd7legdLVrkQMrM9Lo85RrCbHeUNaC5lJ_QzjPdkE_8KNLPX5403Cuc22WLd5nDPPIrBSsKS-JPvnKhtb7lnNqn9kkpcLqzsXEjNlj0TM/s400/dumbass02.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5583148259593142594" border="0" /></a><br /><a style="color: rgb(0, 0, 0);" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNYxR5tNP1jaW3RTZ0n30qJKtMYOGNt4VT9HMlGPDDUdFLRtjcG_wOxSqyGbejgcb6XChxyjkIvp1tZJw6Lb8YEsFvReVGg6Ph55AFPbkAJlTWlcTEEFKdeCmjYefDfgPSkZPvIAdl0QVy/s1600/dumbass.JPG"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 166px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNYxR5tNP1jaW3RTZ0n30qJKtMYOGNt4VT9HMlGPDDUdFLRtjcG_wOxSqyGbejgcb6XChxyjkIvp1tZJw6Lb8YEsFvReVGg6Ph55AFPbkAJlTWlcTEEFKdeCmjYefDfgPSkZPvIAdl0QVy/s400/dumbass.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5583148253737806594" border="0" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-15462170923684797202011-03-06T16:13:00.001-08:002011-03-06T16:35:08.316-08:00Things You Can't UnseeThis is an animated gif...but, magically, Blogger doesn't play animated gifs.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7is3sty-qKnDJGCw2UXECrc5T0n4hnpy1jmvhaNPjiGHjX5oLwdl5-ZSjyHjvZC3i_opDzWQC3sqTxD9UGR0JRgLxbTLX9pZyvPAGbZW26kicEUeJO6Hf-F81c1zEtTzAXn41a5q1rxVG/s1600/lohan.gif"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 329px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj7is3sty-qKnDJGCw2UXECrc5T0n4hnpy1jmvhaNPjiGHjX5oLwdl5-ZSjyHjvZC3i_opDzWQC3sqTxD9UGR0JRgLxbTLX9pZyvPAGbZW26kicEUeJO6Hf-F81c1zEtTzAXn41a5q1rxVG/s400/lohan.gif" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5581124694105287474" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-9274755857438860052011-03-04T16:56:00.000-08:002011-03-04T16:56:06.426-08:00Aforesaid?<div class="MsoNormal">Dear Sir/Madam,<br />
<br />
It gives me a great pleasure to invite you to the forth coming international seminar which the International Institute for Global Care (IIGC) is exited to be hosting in February 28th to March 5th 2011 at Webster hall New York City USA, and from March 7th to 11th at Dakar City Hall. Dakar - Senegal.<br />
<br />
The theme of the forth coming seminar are; Racism and Human Right. Delegates who are interested to make a paper presentation are advice to make a summary presentation on the above subject.<br />
<br />
On behalf of the Organizing Committee, I request you to kindly extend your cooperation by giving wide publicity to the aforesaid workshop by sharing this invitation among your staff, members or relatives for their<br />
active participation in the workshop.<br />
<br />
Note: the I.I.G.C. will be providing all delegates with to and fro Air ticket and also visa’s guidance for the seminar purpose. Looking forward for your cooperation and support for the success of the workshop.<br />
<br />
Registration is open now! Contact the organizing secretary Mrs. Christina G. Humphrey for more information.<br />
<br />
Email: event_secretary_iigc@globomail.com<br />
<br />
See you in the Seminar.<br />
<br />
Regards<br />
<br />
Miss Brenda Charles<br />
<br />
brenda_charles@globomail.com</div><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">**********************************</div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">The preceding is a verbatim copy of an email I received a while back. Some of you may have received this or a similar one. I fell for reading it because of the title of the supposed organization. In my search for geospatially related work, I've applied to a lot of companies who could be associated with such an outfit. I've also joined various groups, such as on LinkedIn, that have leanings toward things global.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I was immediately made suspicious by the slovenly spelling and grammar: "a great pleasure" and "exited" to name a few. Beside all that, it was unfathomable why any such organization would invite me to an international conference, even if I was an erstwhile wanna-be GIS Tech.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I did a little checking, and found that there while there is indeed an email service called globomail.com, (another red flag: wouldn't a large enough organization have its own domain for email?) there is no evidence of the existence of any International Institute for Global Care. That's not to say that there isn't plenty of discussion of the IIGC - lots of people have gotten this email, and have attempted to verify the seeming source.</div><div style="text-align: left;"> </div><div style="text-align: left;"> This certain scam is somewhat refreshing from the usual in that it doesn't immediately ask you to send money somewhere or reveal personal and/or financial information. I'm sure that comes after you respond to the "exited" Ms. Charles.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">I was originally going to post this email on <i>The Punctuator!</i>, but I decided that it was a perfect example of nincompoopery on the internet: incompetent scammers, and the (no doubt more than a few) gullible sorts who fall for these things.</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-30518270230220019422011-01-25T16:35:00.001-08:002011-01-25T16:35:48.699-08:00I Love the Internet<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TT9sSquptAI/AAAAAAAADpw/gXyoYsDAv2c/s1600/na+na+na+na+na.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="78" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TT9sSquptAI/AAAAAAAADpw/gXyoYsDAv2c/s320/na+na+na+na+na.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-81955624523483710362011-01-15T05:45:00.001-08:002011-01-15T05:49:59.000-08:00Why I Love The InternetClick to view....<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://louxis.com/videos/peacock/peacock2.swf"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 302px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjnWApY_V98j_7ziMAHncTXSVR59Jh3FG_uUoHzpw2eR4GN0l70Be-2tbxYF5ymvPZIA5Emi5pw45F3yC8iDLbLnLIkZuFfIi73zRCQhbjYN-FEf8lf0Ytj1cu7l3zgYbYbgTCI_BsIv86g/s400/cap.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5562408957822560226" border="0" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-82766122304068366132011-01-09T09:29:00.000-08:002011-01-09T09:32:47.020-08:00PC vs MacThis rivalry makes for some fun lunacy on the Instanet!<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiszp3eAZ6mDnG0n-Z7QYAyU8BL2-0KSmPanbkeeQWpSGiB7VsJ8D-TEXGkmv-si65BBh04hkRRW0kvPMxJK2Z4-Zc1hGNpVEeSiPKmboLM7CDXq2Opu8DT4CXytpnLVFZtMiPjnnYlWYlw/s1600/pcvsmac.jpg"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 289px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiszp3eAZ6mDnG0n-Z7QYAyU8BL2-0KSmPanbkeeQWpSGiB7VsJ8D-TEXGkmv-si65BBh04hkRRW0kvPMxJK2Z4-Zc1hGNpVEeSiPKmboLM7CDXq2Opu8DT4CXytpnLVFZtMiPjnnYlWYlw/s400/pcvsmac.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5560239847539307682" border="0" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-41722020243803828392011-01-03T02:39:00.001-08:002011-01-03T02:40:24.689-08:00Bad Dog!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXC2Fh2lrI1ucO52pJJeDquXQTsm2ID94JKgtJs_DhyphenhyphensjolmIPxfKxyqDRgUxClW2BmTVyyGaQ0eMN8JDKh1GLfct7LcwM2KoI0uCgsVdvyflnrYjBVMugExoqjVgq9HV6ZjJds9k5l8tG/s1600/terriers.png"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 400px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 281px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5557907477807699346" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXC2Fh2lrI1ucO52pJJeDquXQTsm2ID94JKgtJs_DhyphenhyphensjolmIPxfKxyqDRgUxClW2BmTVyyGaQ0eMN8JDKh1GLfct7LcwM2KoI0uCgsVdvyflnrYjBVMugExoqjVgq9HV6ZjJds9k5l8tG/s400/terriers.png" /></a><br /><div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-4301419155016683102010-12-26T08:08:00.000-08:002010-12-26T09:45:52.049-08:00Christmas CreativityPretty fucking awesome!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh98V0vPsls8wWqZscJXRGFMDSyJ4kojcNknxwNL4b1_RMhdsUWE98QfvPhKerBvozVFA07iTig92wKFPbYdqtPrSk0ASZaOoEt9Z-YVUQYNKI47E4C7XYIhcWtHTfBXf32FE7_0shEOz57/s1600/a_simple_christmas.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5555023630352592386" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh98V0vPsls8wWqZscJXRGFMDSyJ4kojcNknxwNL4b1_RMhdsUWE98QfvPhKerBvozVFA07iTig92wKFPbYdqtPrSk0ASZaOoEt9Z-YVUQYNKI47E4C7XYIhcWtHTfBXf32FE7_0shEOz57/s400/a_simple_christmas.jpg" style="cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 300px; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; width: 400px;" /></a>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-52987032272924686642010-12-14T01:06:00.000-08:002010-12-14T01:06:00.379-08:00It's Nannerpus<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TQaK0dZzlsI/AAAAAAAADds/SzAN9iHD4QU/s1600/nannerpuss+diabeaties.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="287" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TQaK0dZzlsI/AAAAAAAADds/SzAN9iHD4QU/s320/nannerpuss+diabeaties.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">100% Wrong</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
This post is a little Christmas gift for my blog partner, Carlos, who loves him the <a href="http://ravingsfromsanantonio.blogspot.com/2009/02/its-nannerpus.html">Nannerpus</a>. Lately, this blog seems to have diverted a wee bit from criticizing nincompoops on the internet, and has been chronicling some just plain <a href="http://theveryshortbus.blogspot.com/2010/10/fuck-yeah.html">awesome</a> <a href="http://theveryshortbus.blogspot.com/2010/11/awesomeness.html">stuff</a> on the internet. I say, if we can't beat 'em, join 'em! The <strike>lunatics</strike> nincompoops are <strike>running</strike> driving the <strike>asylum</strike> short bus!<br />
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Incidentally, the creator of this motivational poster didn't just misspell diabetes, but Nannerpus as well (see Carlos's original post for more information).Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-50002504756188434932010-12-13T12:54:00.000-08:002010-12-13T13:20:26.544-08:00Moar Awesomeness<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TQaHx5z58pI/AAAAAAAADdo/xCybT20Lgm8/s1600/chewy+squirrel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TQaHx5z58pI/AAAAAAAADdo/xCybT20Lgm8/s320/chewy+squirrel.jpg" width="213" /></a></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-12477880567970569302010-11-27T20:33:00.000-08:002010-11-27T20:37:24.036-08:00Tittle-atingI've been hanging onto these for awhile. I'm not sure why I haven't posted them sooner. They do seem to go along so well with the theme of this blog: the internet in the hands of nincompoops. It's hard for me to image a website that is a better example of a kind of lowest-common-denominator mentality than Craig's List.<br />
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A few months back I was in the market for a used car, so I checked out Craig's List. I resisted the urge to put a lot of the mistakes in these screen caps in <i>The Punctuator!</i> because it would be just too easy, like shooting fish in a barrel. It's for this same reason that I don't pick on errors in emails or forums. They're just too many of them.<br />
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The main thing that struck me about the CL posts shown here (and the umpteen others I'm not showing) is the widespread misspelling of the word "title" as "tittle". Why do so many people seem to think this is the way to spell "title"? <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTAKWSDrI/AAAAAAAADbg/TeBD3H_RTyY/s1600/tittle1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="182" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTAKWSDrI/AAAAAAAADbg/TeBD3H_RTyY/s320/tittle1.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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</tbody></table><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>I get the impression the author of this post may be ESL because of that strange "...with the miles....", but that's still no excuse for "tittle". In addition, I like "...the car runs good theres [sic] no problem with the car". Me thinks he doth protest too much.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTA-sUZKI/AAAAAAAADbk/7tOGtbnqkjA/s1600/tittle2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="76" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTA-sUZKI/AAAAAAAADbk/7tOGtbnqkjA/s320/tittle2.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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Lots of little mistakes here in addition to the "tittle", too many to enumerate. I can't help but point out the "mud train" tires, however. I'm pretty sure she meant "mud terrain".<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTBOkjKRI/AAAAAAAADbo/PEYbdT_dxcw/s1600/tittle3.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="84" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTBOkjKRI/AAAAAAAADbo/PEYbdT_dxcw/s320/tittle3.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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</tbody></table>Quite a few mistakes for a short post. I'm glad the vehicle has "good conditions".<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTEl8Qq0I/AAAAAAAADbs/ax2ez_rhKAs/s1600/tittle4.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="104" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTEl8Qq0I/AAAAAAAADbs/ax2ez_rhKAs/s320/tittle4.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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CHEEAP!!!!<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTE2pK2hI/AAAAAAAADbw/hSu9drtIYZw/s1600/tittle5.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="79" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHTE2pK2hI/AAAAAAAADbw/hSu9drtIYZw/s320/tittle5.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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</tbody></table><br />
Oops, I forgot to highlight the "tittle". Are people who sell used cars on Craig's List and people with at least an 8th Grade education mutually exclusive groups?<br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHZuNe5sKI/AAAAAAAADb4/nAK89rFB2iM/s1600/tittle6.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="104" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TPHZuNe5sKI/AAAAAAAADb4/nAK89rFB2iM/s320/tittle6.JPG" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
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</tbody></table><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
A Plymputh Voyager, eh? This guy has a lot of problems. From the context in which he says "paid", I think he actually meant "pay". I wonder what he uses the smock for. He also doesn't seem to know what street he lives on. There's a North Cedar, and there's a Nord, but no "Nord Cidar".<br />
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Well, that's it for our little cavalcade of tittles. I'll see you next time.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-68407100530626196352010-11-05T15:42:00.000-07:002010-11-05T15:43:36.104-07:00Awesomeness<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6bAXCYtDBMLvMVC6YhyphenhyphencojbE_e-V_91h6FwE_pB8W_-6KKJbIoOmPkamgWWn8tFYCmNg4_L45bpNJg23pRASNm_sEXiGNqvKvF_oVrd09nI38WnmAqKKDRx1kVDbs2z_TaJy3ppt3TlY_/s1600/5605.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 400px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 342px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5536199987430981458" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6bAXCYtDBMLvMVC6YhyphenhyphencojbE_e-V_91h6FwE_pB8W_-6KKJbIoOmPkamgWWn8tFYCmNg4_L45bpNJg23pRASNm_sEXiGNqvKvF_oVrd09nI38WnmAqKKDRx1kVDbs2z_TaJy3ppt3TlY_/s400/5605.jpg" /></a><br /><div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-21027445008586666972010-10-30T03:53:00.000-07:002010-10-30T03:56:12.663-07:00Memorialize This!<div align="justify">I’m pleased to see someone besides me is bugged by <a href="http://therantsinmypants.blogspot.com/2010/10/at-least-until-next-rain.html">these</a> mobile memorials. Every time I see one, I think:<br /><br />- Why? Isn’t it enough that the person’s dead? Do you really need a constant reminder of their passing every time you see your car from behind or look in your rear-view mirror (assuming you’re not too stupid to read mirrored text).<br /><br />- “In loving memory of” and “dedicated to” are phrases you usually see on a memorial object, like a library or a memorial. So what the fuck? Is the survivor dedicating their non-descript fucking mini-van to their dearly fucking departed? When I die, I sure as hell hope no one dedicates a mini-van, PT Cruiser, etc. to me!<br /><br />- The only person I’d like to see memorialized on a car is the person who started this stupid fucking fad.<br /><br />- Do survivors really think the general public gives a shit about their little Billy? I gots news for ‘em – We don’t.<br /><br />And while we’re on the topic of rants, why are Hispanics the only ones who regale us with their surnames on the back windows of their vehicles? Being half Mexican, that really baffles me, because I’ve never had that urge….not even partially ;-) Why don’t we see cars with surnames like Jones or Brown in gothic lettering across the back windows of Anglos, Blacks and Asians? I’m just sayin’.</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-15207649502714766642010-10-29T02:45:00.000-07:002010-10-29T02:46:48.823-07:00Fuck YeahThis cracks me the fuck up!<br /><br /><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHuWmpSJM0fN6Fyv4lmdrkVT45Y5gPapyQyzu6iUwMiE3l27fsdAu7o8lukLT-LJyrcz0QwJF5TErXI9-mPA6Akt4En8oSjxrNcCfzJeAJv7i10J17xwgDyvsTEpo5bGa2996c3e2Bbkjd/s1600/35749.jpg"><img style="MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; WIDTH: 359px; FLOAT: left; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5533402165466269394" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHuWmpSJM0fN6Fyv4lmdrkVT45Y5gPapyQyzu6iUwMiE3l27fsdAu7o8lukLT-LJyrcz0QwJF5TErXI9-mPA6Akt4En8oSjxrNcCfzJeAJv7i10J17xwgDyvsTEpo5bGa2996c3e2Bbkjd/s400/35749.jpg" /></a><br /><div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-37372826231864009322010-09-11T19:36:00.000-07:002010-09-11T19:36:31.399-07:00You Are a Nincompoop<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TIrqkutfd0I/AAAAAAAACqA/MijF8V67ywM/s1600/piolet.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TIrqkutfd0I/AAAAAAAACqA/MijF8V67ywM/s320/piolet.jpg" /></a></div><br />
I don't know if you remember <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balloon_boy_hoax">Balloon Boy</a>, but this little item was a response to that non-news story. I thought there was something kind of familiar sounding about the construction of this attempt at humor. I did some research and rediscovered a meme with which I was already familiar: <a href="http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/buzzkilling">buzzkilling</a>, which was - as the linked page will tell you - itself spawned by <a href="http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/put-yourself-in-my-shoes">this bit of hilarity</a> from the mad geniuses at <a href="http://www.somethingawful.com/">SomethingAwful</a>. <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div>So the creator of this inanity was attempting to mash together a couple of memes, succeeding only marginally. Too bad he didn't know how to spell "pilot".Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-44488506844421466342010-09-05T22:38:00.000-07:002010-09-05T22:38:17.295-07:00Tunnel of Loathe<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TIR2wYUBDTI/AAAAAAAACp4/SQWqP2yadK0/s1600/luthor+takes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TIR2wYUBDTI/AAAAAAAACp4/SQWqP2yadK0/s320/luthor+takes.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Hi again. Back with more on motivational (or demotivational) posters. This is an example of a sub-meme called a <a href="http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/demotivational-tunnel">demotivational tunnel</a>. As you can see, first someone creates a poster, then someone else thinks they can improve upon it, so they put the original poster inside a new poster. This can go on until the original is illegible, creating a kind of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Droste_effect">Droste effect</a>.<br />
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If the creator of the original poster didn't screw something up, it's never long before one of the tunnelers does. In today's example, it only took one iteration for the fail to rear its ugly head. The nincompoop tunneler misspelled "does" and then bungs an apostrophe into "takes" for good measure.<br />
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By the way, if you're not familiar with Lex Luthor's cake thieving ways, <a href="http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/lex-luthor-took-forty-cakes">here's some more information about that</a>.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-20343363485823950322010-09-04T18:18:00.000-07:002010-09-04T20:17:13.741-07:00Divide by Zero<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TILmh0QtedI/AAAAAAAACpo/i8swMPYQEng/s1600/accidentallyby0.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/TILmh0QtedI/AAAAAAAACpo/i8swMPYQEng/s320/accidentallyby0.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Hi. Been awhile. I was about to give up on this blog. After a brief burst of new creativity, I ran dry. But my blog partner <a href="http://ravingsfromsanantonio.blogspot.com/">Carlos</a> talked me out of it. He suggested we could just write individual posts when we felt like it, rather than worrying about collaborating, which is a cumbersome and time consuming process. <br />
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I had been saving up a few things which I wanted to try to work up into a big post like the previous two. But now I'll just go ahead and throw them up here with a few (hopefully) pithy (or at least mean-spirited) comments.<br />
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Today's post deals with an example of a motivational poster, a popular thing to do on the internet. I enjoy reading these (when they're well-done) and I've even made a couple myself. My favorite place to do this is <a href="http://bighugelabs.com/motivator.php">Big Huge Labs</a>. Apparently now you need to register to use the sight. It's free, and if you already have a Facebook account (admit it, you do), it's easy too.<br />
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One of the things I like about motivational posters is - in addition to being a meme themselves - the way they tend to focus on memes, further spreading and modifying them. Today's example features the "<a href="http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/divide-by-zero">divide by zero</a>" meme. I just find it amazing that someone sat down to create this and screwed up this badly. Not only did he misspell "accidentally", he left out the word "divided"! How did he miss this? Was he drunk? Was he having trouble fitting the complete phrase onto one line and figured, "Aw, fuck it. They'll know what I'm talking about"? Or is he just one of the millions of lazy, semi-literate people who populate the internet, filling it up with half-assed garbage? I'm going to go with the last one.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-61421084508048635682010-03-07T11:35:00.000-08:002010-03-07T21:44:26.480-08:00Totally Looks Like Somebody Should be Riding the Short Bus<div align="justify"><a href="http://totallylookslike.com/">Totally Looks Like</a> - part of the vast <a href="http://cheezburger.com/sites">Cheezburger</a> empire - is, to my mind, one the most egregious examples of the theme of this blog: the power of the internet in the hands of nincompoops. The premise of the site is simple: contributors put up two side-by-side photos, usually one of a celebrity next to someone or something that bears a striking resemble to the celebrity, like the following example:</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4GfG4ufKNI/AAAAAAAAB9E/hx1F8NWpLrY/s1600-h/tiny+tim.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4GfG4ufKNI/AAAAAAAAB9E/hx1F8NWpLrY/s320/tiny+tim.jpg" /></a></div><br />
I don't want to seem like I'm bashing the site itself. I like it for the most part. When it works, it can be very entertaining, but when it fails, it does so catastrophically. I think a common cause of some of these failures (aside from the fact that some people are just stupid) is simple ignorance, especially ignorance of pop culture and history. When you couple ignorance with being too lazy to do a few moments of research as to why two things might be similar, you get results like the following:<br />
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</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4DNnC3sORI/AAAAAAAAB7Y/aSOzqfg8Zyo/s1600-h/book-totally-looks-like-queen-album.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4DNnC3sORI/AAAAAAAAB7Y/aSOzqfg8Zyo/s320/book-totally-looks-like-queen-album.jpg" /></a></div><br />
Now, I knew about the cover of the Queen album depicted on the right. I was not aware, however, of the image on the left, from the October 1953 issue of Astounding Science Fiction. Apparently, whoever contributed this must not have been aware of it either. Then he/she ran across the older image and was struck by the similarity. Yes, that's right: we were both <i>ignorant </i>of the magazine cover<i>, </i>but if I had stumbled across the original image, I probably would have said something like, "Wow, so that's where Queen got the idea for the cover of <i>News of the World</i>." Did the contributor think that Queen was just stealing the image from Frank Kelly Freas? Did she/he think that the two images are just the result of an amazing coincidence? A few moments of Googling would have cleared up any misconceptions. Perhaps he/she knew the truth, but just has a penchant for stating the obvious.<br />
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</div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4DN4tBx9vI/AAAAAAAAB7g/NE-UNwUEOM4/s1600-h/chumbawumba-totally-looks-like-arm-and-hammer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4DN4tBx9vI/AAAAAAAAB7g/NE-UNwUEOM4/s320/chumbawumba-totally-looks-like-arm-and-hammer.jpg" /></a> </div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Another example of what must be either a bad case of stating the obvious, or some innate inability to be able to understand why a music group would want to reference a popular advertising icon in order to boost shelf recognition.</div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4DSDRnIioI/AAAAAAAAB7o/kPMROZq7dFs/s1600-h/italy+boot.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4DSDRnIioI/AAAAAAAAB7o/kPMROZq7dFs/s320/italy+boot.jpg" /></a> </div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Yes, Italy looks like a boot (or "shoe" if you prefer). Everybody knows this. I remember watching an old cartoon on TV when I was kid in which somehow the "boot" gets pulled off the "foot" of Italy, exposing either a stocking or a bare appendage, engendering consternation on the part of the giant body part. I'm sure that as soon as the first cartographer drew Italy hundreds of years ago, someone looking over his shoulder exclaimed, "Hey-a, it's-a boot-a!" (or some equivalent phrase in the stereotypical accent of your choice). Does the person who contributed this think he or she is the first person to note the similarity?</div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FgYidlWDI/AAAAAAAAB7w/YeAoOXE_JEs/s1600-h/drink+play+fork.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FgYidlWDI/AAAAAAAAB7w/YeAoOXE_JEs/s320/drink+play+fork.jpg" /></a></div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify">Hey, genius, there's a reason that these two books look alike: the one on the left is a parody of the one on the right. If you don't believe me, here's <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/3476199.Drink_Play_F_k_One_Man_s_Search_for_Anything_Across_Ireland_Las_Vegas_and_Thailand">a link</a> to a page on the internet (you know, the same system of inter-connected computers with a vast storehouse of information available for free and with minimal effort you used to create your little gem) that explains it. Oh, and here's an <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parody">explanation of parody</a> for future reference.</div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4Fg7vkqPeI/AAAAAAAAB74/LXnJ8lrscG0/s1600-h/collective-soul-album-cover-totally-looks-like-sweeney-todd-book-cover.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4Fg7vkqPeI/AAAAAAAAB74/LXnJ8lrscG0/s320/collective-soul-album-cover-totally-looks-like-sweeney-todd-book-cover.jpg" /></a> </div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: justify;">More of the same sort of idiocy. Collective Soul deliberately used a modified version of the artwork from Stephen Sondheim's 1979 stage musical "<i>Sweeney Todd: Demon Barber of Fleet Street</i>". Of course, if you only have a cumulative mental age of about 12, like most of the commenters on totallylookslike.com, you're not going to know about this. One sharper-than-average commenter said, <i>"</i>Wow…something looks exactly like itself…wow…just…wow. Congrats, submitter…you are an idiot<i>", </i>which prompted one of the aforementioned 12 year olds to reply: <i>"</i>Settle down! For a lot of us, Johnny Depp is the only version of Sweeney Todd that we have been exposed to. I would never have made the connection between the two without this submission.<i>"</i> Another commenter then replied: <i>"</i>Just because you’re so poorly exposed to society doesn’t mean that [first commenter] doesn’t have a point here. Maybe YOU need to settle down, rather than getting all defensive because you’ve culturally ignorant of things like this." To which I add a hearty "Hear hear!"</div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FhZLnKVkI/AAAAAAAAB8I/XO2adktmE6I/s1600-h/stifler-tll-andy-roddick.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FhZLnKVkI/AAAAAAAAB8I/XO2adktmE6I/s320/stifler-tll-andy-roddick.jpg" /></a> </div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">This section brings me to one of my pettiest pet peeves with this website; namely, when a contributor refers to an actor not by his real name but by the name of a character he or she has portrayed. Now, I am aware that is essentially what is going on in my example of a good contribution at the top of the page. The difference is that Danny DeVito dressed up as The Penguin from <i>Batman</i> <i>Returns</i> looks very different from Danny DeVito without makeup. You wouldn't say, "Danny DeVito totally looks like Tiny Tim", because he doesn't. Saying "Danny DeVito as The Penguin totally looks like Tiny Tim" would be more accurate, but it is also cumbersome. Sean William Scott playing Stifler, however, looks no different than any other character Seann William Scott has played. How hard is it to look up the name of the actor who played Stifler? I'll tell you: not at all. It took me, like, two seconds.</div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify"></div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FhIzhVKxI/AAAAAAAAB8A/rCnsU37aWaM/s1600-h/linda+hunt.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FhIzhVKxI/AAAAAAAAB8A/rCnsU37aWaM/s320/linda+hunt.jpg" /></a> </div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4Fqy8efbGI/AAAAAAAAB8g/JY25PvKlkwE/s1600-h/dr-ann-cuthbert-from-the-movie-relic-totally-looks-like-edna-mode.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4Fqy8efbGI/AAAAAAAAB8g/JY25PvKlkwE/s320/dr-ann-cuthbert-from-the-movie-relic-totally-looks-like-edna-mode.jpg" /></a></div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FqIDPSTOI/AAAAAAAAB8Q/UZTHZKoguFs/s1600-h/hetty+lange.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FqIDPSTOI/AAAAAAAAB8Q/UZTHZKoguFs/s320/hetty+lange.jpg" /></a></div><br />
This brings us to poor little Linda Hunt. At least three contributors noticed her resemblance to Edna Mode from <i>The Incredibles</i>. Unfortunately, none of those contributors could seem to conjure up the necessary wherewithal to find out what her real name is. All three called her by the name of a character she has portrayed. One of them couldn't even figure out the name of the character (Dr. Mittag-Leffler), opting instead to just call her "the shrink of Stranger than fiction [sic]".<br />
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I am willing to let the Hetty Lange comparison slide, however. Linda Hunt playing Hetty Lange (from <i>NCIS: Los Angeles</i>) does look the most like Edna Mode because of the identical (in shape if not in size) glasses. I hope Linda Hunt doesn't actually wear those glasses off the set. It's her life, but if she does, she's only inviting people to draw comparisons to a cartoon character. It would be like if Jack Black started parading about in a panda suit.<br />
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At first I thought that these three Linda Hunt/Edna Mode references were just more examples of people stating the obvious. I had seen bits of the <i>The Incredibles</i> and I thought Linda Hunt was the voice of Edna Mode. The fact that Edna looks like Linda Hunt I attributed to the fact that Disney and Pixar animators tend to imbue their characters with certain resemblances to the actors who voice them. The fact the Linda Hunt now wears those glasses on <i>NCIS: LA </i>seemed a little creepy to me. I thought maybe she had gone a bit daft and was now modeling herself after her cartoon avatar. A little research turned up that not only was Linda Hunt<i> not </i>the voice of Edna Mode, but that Edna Mode was modeled after famous Hollywood costume designer Edith Head:</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FrJwRmJTI/AAAAAAAAB8o/l7HShtM1EbI/s1600-h/edith+head.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4FrJwRmJTI/AAAAAAAAB8o/l7HShtM1EbI/s320/edith+head.jpg" /></a> </div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div align="justify" class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Well, that about wraps up my little tirade against people who seem to go all retarded when they see two things that look alike. A note to Totallylookslike.com contributors: it's the internet, people. You don't have to take everything on it as gospel truth, but every piece of missing information from the examples above was supplied by a few minutes of practicing a seemingly lost art called <i>'r-e-s-e-a-r-c-h'. </i>If this downward trend doesn't reverse itself, we may soon seen a contribution like this:</div><div align="justify"><br />
</div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4Iz-NHC-qI/AAAAAAAAB9M/4zt3i6VLRcs/s1600-h/olsen-twins.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="285" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S4Iz-NHC-qI/AAAAAAAAB9M/4zt3i6VLRcs/s400/olsen-twins.jpg" width="400" /></a><b> </b><br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><b>Ashley Olsen totally looks like Mary-Kate Olsen!</b></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-30157412724697158352010-02-12T04:50:00.000-08:002010-02-12T02:50:13.082-08:00Socially Awkward Penguin<div align="justify">The internet is arguably the most potent research tool available, yet the average <a href="http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/netizen">netizen</a> seemingly can’t be bothered with opening a browser to verify something before spewing out total garbage upon an unsuspecting public.<br /><br />Even if you don’t want to avail yourself of the limitless options for fact checking on the Web, the computer you’re using to access the ‘Net has tools like spell checkers, built-in dictionaries, and word processing software that allows you to turn out an acceptable product.<br /><br />Sadly, many folks are under the impression that a computer magically transforms the clickety-clacking of their fingers into comprehensive output that is acceptable, consumable, and comprehensible to the general populous.<br /><br />One of the most prominent examples of this phenomenon is in the promulgation of various internet memes. Even if you’re not familiar with <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Meme">the concept</a>, you’ve probably seen some. If you’ve ever been <a href="http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/rickroll">rickrolled</a> or LOLed at a <a href="http://icanhascheezburger.com/">LOLcat</a>, you’ve seen a meme. A popular meme is <a href="http://knowyourmeme.com/memes/advice-dog">Advice Dog</a>, which has had many offshoots, one of the most prominent being Socially Awkward Penguin (SAP).<br /><br />I don’t know how the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/4chan">/b/tards</a> and whatnot who originate these things create them in the first place, but since most of them are computer geeks to begin with, I’m sure it’s no problem for them. I’m far from being a computer whiz, but I was able to create some reasonable facsimiles of a standard Socially Awkward Penguin by experimenting around with a blank SAP template in Microsoft Paint and Word.<br /><br />However, if a meme gets popular enough, you don’t have to have any mad computer skills beyond being able to use a Web browser in order to join in the fun, because you can find <a href="http://memegenerator.net/">meme generating websites</a> that pretty much do all the work for you. All you have to do is select a template, type in your incredibly witty saying and hit the “create” button. And that’s where all the problems really begin. It would appear that some people get so excited about actually contributing to a popular Web phenom that they just flail away at their keyboards and don’t bother even glancing at their <i>bon mots</i> for typos and misspellings before they commit them to posterity.<br /><br />As I was perusing Advice Dog and his off-shoots at the above-mentioned sites and in Google searches, I noticed that SAP seemed to be more prone to terrible spelling and punctuation than other variants. I pondered why this might be, and came to the conclusion that awkward people are probably drawn to SAP, and the more awkward one is, the more awkward are going to be one’s creations. It does seem to reflect some basic human foibles (if you ignore the more disturbing references like fapping to pictures of your sister and such). I started feeling like a SAP (no pun intended) after reading enough of them.<br /><br />I also got the feeling that a typical SAP creator is perhaps less comfortable with computers than the average meme spreader, as you shall see.<br /><br /></div><div class="separator" style="CLEAR: both; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align="justify"><a style="MARGIN-LEFT: 1em; MARGIN-RIGHT: 1em" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_QzBAT0yI/AAAAAAAAB20/h6dRWXEAf7A/s1600-h/ment.JPG" imageanchor="1"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_QzBAT0yI/AAAAAAAAB20/h6dRWXEAf7A/s320/ment.JPG" border="0" /></a></div><div align="justify"><br /><br />It looks like this person used MS Paint to make their SAP, but he couldn’t figure out how to make text boxes, so used the pencil or airbrush tool instead. Also, he can’t spell or write in complete sentences. He obviously didn’t use a meme generator, which may not have existed when he made this. I don’t know what method he used to find a blank SAP, so props to him for that.<br /><br /></div><div class="separator" style="CLEAR: both; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align="justify"><a style="MARGIN-LEFT: 1em; MARGIN-RIGHT: 1em" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_Q_5VuUAI/AAAAAAAAB28/rMJwOHAxL6I/s1600-h/forwarded.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_Q_5VuUAI/AAAAAAAAB28/rMJwOHAxL6I/s320/forwarded.jpg" border="0" /></a></div><div align="justify"><br />Now, this person appears to have used MS Paint as well, and even created the entire image from scratch. I wonder if he had trouble finding a blank SAP, but I suppose he should get some points for creativity even if he almost obliterates his drawing with his terrible scrawled text.<br /><br /></div><div class="separator" style="CLEAR: both; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align="justify"><a style="MARGIN-LEFT: 1em; MARGIN-RIGHT: 1em" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_ROdj_hQI/AAAAAAAAB3E/eFLH2atj5nE/s1600-h/discretely.png" imageanchor="1"><img height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_ROdj_hQI/AAAAAAAAB3E/eFLH2atj5nE/s320/discretely.png" width="320" border="0" /></a></div><div align="justify"><br />This one looks fine at first glance. There are no spelling mistakes, and the font looks nice. However, discretely means “as a separate independent unit”; the creator meant “discreetly”. Close, but no cigar.<br /><br /></div><div class="separator" style="CLEAR: both; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align="justify"><a style="MARGIN-LEFT: 1em; MARGIN-RIGHT: 1em" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_RbYNO84I/AAAAAAAAB3M/jQmF2yB8F7w/s1600-h/disgustingly.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_RbYNO84I/AAAAAAAAB3M/jQmF2yB8F7w/s320/disgustingly.jpg" border="0" /></a></div><div align="justify"><br />Actually, I have no idea what this is even supposed to mean, but I am sure that the author meant “disgustedly”.<br /></div><div class="separator" style="CLEAR: both; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align="justify"><a style="MARGIN-LEFT: 1em; MARGIN-RIGHT: 1em" href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_R45YKitI/AAAAAAAAB3U/fMpv5iWZ544/s1600-h/wtf.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_R45YKitI/AAAAAAAAB3U/fMpv5iWZ544/s320/wtf.jpg" border="0" /></a></div><div align="justify"><br />This one’s certainly verbose. “…make difficult the shot accurate”? I’m going to give this writer the benefit of the doubt and assume that he is not a native English speaker.<br /><br /></div><div class="separator" style="CLEAR: both; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align="justify"><a style="MARGIN-LEFT: 1em; MARGIN-RIGHT: 1em" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_SFvstteI/AAAAAAAAB3c/ss7vX0Kebwk/s1600-h/Socially-Awkward-Penguin-I-CAN%27T-HE%27S-FOOTBALL-TEAM.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_SFvstteI/AAAAAAAAB3c/ss7vX0Kebwk/s320/Socially-Awkward-Penguin-I-CAN%27T-HE%27S-FOOTBALL-TEAM.jpg" border="0" /></a></div><div align="justify"><br />Okay, what the fuck? ESL <i>and</i> DD, or just insane?<br /><br /></div><div class="separator" style="CLEAR: both; TEXT-ALIGN: center" align="justify"><a style="MARGIN-LEFT: 1em; MARGIN-RIGHT: 1em" href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_SvD0q0CI/AAAAAAAAB3k/jdkQ4Na03L4/s1600-h/Socially-Awkward-Penguin-PUT-TOOTHPASTE-ON-TOOTHBRUSH-TOOTHPASTE-FALLS-OFF-TOOTHBRUSH-AS-YOU-LIFT-IT.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_FUX4sSNqmEg/S1_SvD0q0CI/AAAAAAAAB3k/jdkQ4Na03L4/s320/Socially-Awkward-Penguin-PUT-TOOTHPASTE-ON-TOOTHBRUSH-TOOTHPASTE-FALLS-OFF-TOOTHBRUSH-AS-YOU-LIFT-IT.jpg" border="0" /></a></div><div align="justify"><br />Now, this last one is a bit of a cheat on my part. I saw one like this somewhere during my research, but I apparently neglected to make a copy of it at the time. As with so many Web-based things, trying to find it again proved impossible, so I had to recreate it over at Memegenerator.net. I assure you that this is essentially what the original said. Apparently the writer doesn’t know what “socially” means, and just reiterated something awkward. Unless he was brushing his teeth in front of a bunch of hyper-critical assholes, I don’t see what could be embarrassing about this.<br /><br />Well, I hope you’ve enjoyed this trip down awkward lane (pun intended). See you next time we take a ride on The Short Bus.</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4853290696410638542.post-43333341535215330572010-01-26T02:25:00.003-08:002010-11-27T20:39:45.840-08:00Welcome<div align="justify">This blog is, as the title and description allude, dedicated to the stupidity, ignorance and illiteracy pervasive in today's online world – a barometer of our very society, if you will.<br />
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Your middle-aged, male authors are Carlos and Rimpy. Carlos lives in a small town outside of San Antonio. Rimpy lives in Northern California. They met on the internet.<br />
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The intent of our narration and commentary is humor, but we make no promises; we're doing this for our entertainment, not money or fame (although that would be okay, too). We hope you enjoy our minuscule contribution to the enormity that is the internet.<br />
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Cheers, motherfuckers.</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2